if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize