11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
God I need to hump something, right now.
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