I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
