Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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