I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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