Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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