North Korea, Best Korea!
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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