last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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