3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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