i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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