he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
