I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
