i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
smell my finger.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
