If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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