i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize