hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
