you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
