so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize