batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
