Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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