I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
