That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
