The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
