i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
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Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
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At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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