why didn't you poke me back
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize