I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
