wat bout pragnant strippers??
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
