Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him