Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.