In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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