Define "chronic" masturbator.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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