I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
