This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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