You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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