my soul wont recognize me after tonight
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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