He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
even my farts smell like vagina
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just had sex on a roof
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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