Screwed.edu
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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