ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
