You work out of a Hotel?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
