I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
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If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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