Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
