I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
