I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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