My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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