I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
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