was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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