You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
