On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
