so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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