He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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