Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
We had to coat check the pizza.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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